Wednesday, February 28, 2007

it's time for a little summer...

is this weather getting anybody else down?? the snow, the freezing drizzle, the slippery sidewalks, or the slush up to the knees would make anyone dream of summer. these pictures are from a little road trip brett and i took last summer up to sleeping bear dunes. we attended a wedding, slept in our little tent, visited local restaurants, ate ice cream and hiked along the lake shore. nothing short of perfect...

first stop, breakfast at grandma's kitchen.


preparing for the day with water

a little more water just in case....


and a little more for good measure. my husband has dehydrophobia...

the lone ranger


a little trail jig

he's ready

visit to the little town of Mesick. perhaps grandma's kitchen wasn't too kind...


nothing a little ice cream can't fix. i look pissed b/c some kids were drawing with sidewalk chalk and there weren't enough pieces for me.


last stop, one of michigan's fine lighthouses. this was supposed to look like i was licking the lighthouse, but instead it looks like i'm licking that guy. what was your motivation here brett?

goodnight summer, goodnight.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

sounds


every year my church holds an evening ash wednesday service. and each year i look forward to going to it. it's a unique service--quiet, little singing, the lights are low, and there stand two crosses at the front of the sanctuary. everyone receives a slip of paper and a pencil when they walk in the door and at the beginning of the service you're told to reflect on the things that you need to give up, the things you need to release from your tightly clenched, slightly sweaty palms, sins that have held you captive over the last year, or years. and finally, towards the end of the service, you're told to make your way to the foot of the cross, grab a hammer, and nail your list into the already scarred wood.

it is the sound of that service that draws me back every year. i could not tell you the point of a single sermon given over the last five years of my attendance. i could not tell you which songs we sang. i could not tell you who i did or didn't see. and quite honestly, i couldn't even tell you what lent really is. 40 days, yada, yada, yada easter...hooray! but, i can tell you about the sound of that service.

i always wait awhile for my turn at the cross. i wait for the sound. slowly people approach the cross and begin nailing. usually one person starts the flow, one person who can't wait a minute more to give it all up to Jesus. tap, tap, tap...tap, tap tap. soon, more people begin pounding in their deepest, darkest secrets and the sound grows. some people pound gently and others swing that hammer as if their lives depended on it. the whole room fills with the sound of pounding.

as i sit there waiting i try to imagine what it might sound like if all of grand rapids were there, pounding away. and then i try to think about what it might sound like if all of michigan, or all of the united states were there, sins in hand. and what might it sound like if the whole world joined in? i believe that weighty sound is what Christ defeated on the cross. i'm sure it was the sound heard as the nails reached wood through our Saviour's hands and feet. it's a very overwhelming sound. it is the sound of saving grace.

when it's my turn i'm always surprised by the sound of my own pounding and relieved to receive the ash cross upon my forehead. -sn

unfortunately i had to miss this year's service but luckily the sound remains with me.

Friday, February 16, 2007

fix my baby

when i was in nigeria, every day i would wake up, put on my brown skirt and my sweaty shirt from the day before and walk 100 feet to the clinic where i was observing, helping, but mostly just sitting. to pass the time i would talk to the nurse, write in my journal, and read the "where there are no doctors" book, the 1979 edition. yes, things in that book were really outdated. but anyway.

patients would slowly trickle in throughout the day and most of them complained about the same thing, "zawa." diarrhea. nurse faith would pull out the same yellow pills and wrap them in torn paper pages that she would fashion into a kind of envelope. then the patient would leave. it was fairly routine. but each person who came in had a different reaction to me, the whitey. and that was the fun part. sometimes i would try out some of my hausa on them, and they would laugh and laugh. sometimes i would just smile and give a concerned nod when i heard mention of "zawa." and sometimes i even got to help with the taking of temperatures and the passing out of yellow pills.

but one day was very different. nurse faith had to make a house call and she wanted me to stay in the clinic. it had been a VERY slow day so i didn't think twice about having all responsibility left to my care. about ten minutes after she left a fulani woman came into the clinic with her baby. the fulani were a strange bunch, beautiful, but strange. they were more blunt than the suvati people who lived in my village. they were nomads, traveling from place to place in their brightly coloured clothes and tattooed eyes. the woman who came in was carrying her baby, her very sick, very malnourished, half-dead baby. she thrust her child into my arms and started speaking to me, desperately, wildly flailing her arms. the assistant who was still in the clinic explained to me that the fulani woman believed that i could "fix" her baby. my white skin meant that i had powers greater than whatever spirits she prayed to at night. it was very scary. i couldn't do anything for her baby. the assistant tried to explain...

it's funny the things we put our faith in to "fix" things. like white skin can fix a dying child. or chocolate can fix a bad day. or a dad can fix a flat tire when he is two hours away from you just b/c he is a dad. or a friend or husband can fix a lonely heart. we put our faith in these things because it's easier than putting your faith in God that things will get better. God doesn't always give quick fixes.

being in school is so hard. i don't know how other people handle it, but sometimes i don't handle it very well. i dread studying at night and on the weekends. i loathe going to school and sitting in a class full of strangers. i hate coming home to my growing pile of clothes that i never have the time or the will to put away. i can't stand that i have a "to do" list that never gets done. i get sad when i realize that i have not done anything fun in over a month. and i feel lonely when i know that i don't have time for anyone or knowing that if i did have time i would more likely just want to sit at home b/c i'm so tired.

all of these thoughts swirl in my head and so i start to look for quick fixes. quick fixes are never good. let's just get that out in the open. and no, i am not doing drugs or hiding bottles of vodka in the tank of my toilet. but, i have put my faith in things that don't promise me a better future. they just promise me a fatter ass and arguments about something stupid. -sn

sometimes i feel like throwing in the towel

that's all for today. -sn

Sunday, February 04, 2007

better than christmas

what could be better than christmas you ask? having two exams scheduled on a monday and then having the school CLOSE b/c of the weather. THAT is pretty much better than anything i can think of...

Friday, February 02, 2007

would you sell your soul for $10,000?


ok, so some of us probably would. but would you sell your integrity? today npr's marketplace covered a story about the UN's most recent environmental report. and it looks grim. 2500 scientists from around the world took part in this all-important research. they asked the question: Global Warming, Who's to Blame?

Their answer? Us.

These scientists are 90% sure that human activity is causing the earth to warm up. They believe the earth could be 11 degrees hotter by the end of the century. on a day like to today, blustery with snow, this may seem like a God-send to us michiganders! but let's think beyond ourselves for a moment. imagine if you were bangladeshi, a country which already suffers from dreadful flooding each year. with warming temperatures come rising waters. millions of peoples' homes will be under water. and if it's too hard to think of a land so far away, then think of our own beloved new yorkers.

this report should make us all shake in our boots. it is scientific evidence. unbiased evidence. i mean c'mon, it's hard to find 2500 scientists from around the world who belong to the same political party, religious group, or science club. i doubt they all subscribe to the same science magazines. and then there is this:

"A conservative think tank reportedly offered scientists and economists as much as $10,000 each to undermine an unsettling UN report on global warming released today. So if they write an article or make a speech which picks holes or finds flaws in the UN report, they could earn themselves up to $10,000."

hmmm...now why do you think they would do that? afraid of the truth? interesting. what's even more interesting is that this so-called "conservative think tank" has been linked to Exxon Mobile, an oil company, probably one of the only groups who will lose out on a cleaner earth. hmmm...what's even more interesting than that is that Exxon Mobile is the oil company most commonly tied to our very own George W. one of the only major world leaders who refuses to sign on to Kyoto, "an amendment to the international treaty on climate change, assigning mandatory targets for the reduction of greenhouse gas emissions to signatory nations." (Wikipedia)

now, i'm just reporting what i heard reported to me this morning. but the whole idea of it makes me sick. i mean, this report could have real potential to spur our leaders to actually DO SOMETHING to help counter this crisis. and more than that, it could have the potential to spur all of us to do something. in fact, one of the scientists interviewed on the show listed simple ways that the every day commoner could help tackle global warming, things like taking the heat down a notch, turning off your lights and using energy efficient bulbs, taking the bus or better yet, your bike. obviously we've all heard things like this before, and then ignored them. but, no time like the present after the release of a very scary report to start implementing them. the scientist then went on to point out that "green equals green." taking care of the earth can save you money in the end. save money? why...count me in!

let's just hope that $10,000 is not enough to sweep this little bit of evidence under the political carpet and out of our minds.

if you'd like to listen to the report yourself (or read part the transcript), go here:

http://marketplace.publicradio.org/shows/2007/02/02/AM200702021.html -sn

curls


it's the ol' struggle. you have straight hair, you want curly hair. you have curly hair, you long to have thin, straight, shiny, blows-in-the-wind, down to your butt strands. the hair of tv stars, movie stars. jennifer aniston hair.

i have thick curly hair. my mother's hair. i've written before about my mother's epic hair battles. i have those battles too. usually i wear my hair short, the shorter the better. but i am trying to grow it long. my goal is a ponytail. but my hair grows painfully slow. already a year since my last trim and my hair only just barely kisses my shoulders. the longer it gets the greater the battle.

if you do not have curly hair you do not understand the "science" that is curly hair. you cannot use a blowdryer. heaven forbid! to blow dry your hair is to turn your hair into a huge, frizzy fro. towel drying is definitely better, but don't you dare rub your hair dry. what then of your curls? you should simply pat and scrunch, pat and scrunch. and choose your products carefully. too much product, to hold the curl, will make your hair crunchy. it will give your hair the much dreaded "wet" look. but too little product=frizz. frizz is the ultimate enemy of curly hair. then there is the question of what to do with the pieces that don't curl as well as the rest. you see, some people have beautiful ringlets dispersed evenly across their noggins. but i dare say that most curly heads share my problem. that is, i've got some pieces that just don't like to curl. so you have massive curls and then a few pieces that just hang in rebellion. i've heard that rebellious teenagers are bad...well, try rebellious strands of hair!

not only do i have curly hair, but i have LOTS of hair. when most people complain about their thick hair i just have to roll my eyes. honey, you do not know what thick hair is! i do not wash my hair every day. in fact, i'm lucky if i wash it twice a week. one reason is that washing curly hair every day is not good for the locks. did you know that? science. and second of all, it takes me about 20 minutes to rinse all of the shampoo and conditioner out of my hair. what a waste of water!

one time i tried to grow dreads. brett helped me roll and tease. he even tied a sea-shell into one of his newly formed masterpieces. i lost that shell. for two weeks it was buried in my knotty hair and i could not find it. sometimes, when i am doing my hair in the morning, i come across a stranded bobby-pin. and i am always puzzled as to how it got there or WHEN it was put in there. and straightening my hair is out of the question. i tried that once. after two hours my arms were tired and i still had half a head of hair to go! i'm pretty sure it would take three of your ponytails to even come close to ONE of mine, it's that thick.

there are websites dedicated to people with curly hair. they are filled with styling tips, product ideas, and message boards brimming with woes from curly tops like myself. here is what one site suggests i do EVERY morning just to make my hair look presentable:

"Use a curl-enhancing mousse throughout wet hair so waves maintain their shape. Let hair air-dry, then section into 2-inch pieces. For each piece, curl loosely around one finger, then pin it to scalp. Set 15 minutes, then style with fingers."

i've tried this technique and it worked! but who has that kind of time every morning? i'm lucky if i even get a shower! and have you ever tried to air-dry thick curly hair? i wet my hair at 8am. it is now noon. my hair is still wet. and most likely it will still be damp at dinner time. do you know how tired i am of looking like a wet dog every day? and it's winter! wet hair is cold!

now my routine consists of wetting, patting dry with a towel (never rubbing), using a drier to half dry my hair (so it doesn't freeze and crack off when i got outside), scrunching, scrunching, scrunching, twirling the rebellious pieces around my finger, spritzing hairspray over whole head, and using bobbypins to tame the mane. if i didn't use those bobbypins my hair would most likely reach out and strangle you. i've got this routine down to about 8 minutes. not bad, but i can't wait for the day when this mass will just fit into a ponytail.

whether i like it or not my hair is a 'big' part of who i am. it has taken me a long time to embrace this part of me and to realize that i will never, ever have jennifer aniston hair. -SN

**neither will i have halle berry hair b/c as my hair stylist pointed out to me after asking her to cut my hair like halle's, "halle berry is black. she has black person's hair." right.